Walking home without her it suddenly dawned on me that this was the last time one of my babies would be starting school for the very first time! It also got me thinking about all the other first's that I will never see again.
The last first cry
The last first smile
The last first laugh
The last first tooth
The last first step
The last first word
The last first day at playschool
The last first day at primary school
I will never see those again.
One day I put down each of my children down and I never picked them up again! I never realised at the time that it would be the last time I would hold them. If I had, I would have hugged them a little longer and a little tighter, I don't think I would ever have been able to put them down.
The same with bedtime stories. Never again would I sit there reading "A Squash and a Squeeze", instead I was replaced by books of their own or tablets and youtube.
Never again will I give them a bath and laugh as they splash and get me wet as I tried to wash their hair. Instead, I was replaced by a shower and music which they sing along to.
Never again will I sit there and brush their hair, pulling it into bunches or a plait. Now I'm replaced by a hairdryer, straighteners, and a mirror.
As they gain in independence I suddenly become redundant. This is the way it should be, but it doesn't stop you feeling sad when you realise all those things you no longer do and how much you wish you could do them again.
All the firsts which became last,
Time passes so quickly and we're so busy being tired and stressed that we miss them. We need to slow down, take a deep breath, stop a minute and hug them tight. Remember they (and you) will never be as young as they are right now again so cherish every moment.
There is a wonderful poem by Rebekah Knight which sums this all up completely
Slow Down Mummy
by Rebekah Knight
Slow down mummy, there is no need to rush,
slow down mummy, what is all the fuss?
Slow down mummy, make yourself a cup of tea.
Slow down mummy, come and spend some time with me.
Slow down mummy, let’s put our boots on and go out for a walk,
let’s kick at piles of leaves, and smile and laugh and talk.
Slow down mummy, you look ever so tired,
come sit and snuggle under the duvet and rest with me a while.
Slow down mummy, those dirty dishes can wait,
slow down mummy, let's have some fun, let's bake a cake!
Slow down mummy I know you work a lot,
but sometimes mummy, it's nice when you just stop.
Sit with us a minute,
& listen to our day,
spend a cherished moment,
because our childhood is not here to stay!